Used Friends


Piece of Cake - What i took to the reception

i used up all my old friends. i got invited to their parties and made an ass out of myself so badly that i embarrassed them more than me.

It didn’t take long before they stopped inviting me and i only knew about their parties when they reveled in them on Monday mornings.

Even though they’re less afraid of me in my sobriety, the invites are only for those partiers who party and it’s certainly better that way.

i was invited to a party today though. One of the guys in AA had a get together at his place for Christmas. It wasn’t the kind of party that ravaged me in the past.

It was one where i belonged.


About Al K Hall

Like a battered drinker or a punch drunk boxer, i am here for another round. For those of you who don’t know me, i’m a semi-professional writer on the rocks and a non-practicing alcoholic (if after 30 years of practicing, you still can't do something well, it's best to just give it up). For those of you who do know me, thanks for stopping by anyway and where’s the ten bucks you owe me? Welcome to my Bar None. A hole in the wall where we can hang out and trade the kind of stories you swap only when you’ve had one too many and either can’t find your way home or are afraid to. Hell, it’s cheaper than therapy and plus the pictures are prettier. Here we’ll crack open bottles and jokes and ‘last call’ are the only dirty words you’ll never hear. Pull up a stool and make yourselves at home.

Posted on December 18, 2011, in Alcoholics Anonymous, Alcoholism, Lessons in Recovery, Recovery and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 6 Comments.

  1. I’m glad that you have found a party where you belong and where you are not ravaged. What a refreshing thing, eh? And I am really proud that you went! It used to be that you could not contemplate going to a social event that did not involve drinking, and if it did not, it was a “waste of time.” So I am really glad to know that you chose to be social, that it was fun, and that you felt you belonged. Good stuff! Wish I could have been there with you…

    I’m having a good party of my own here where my BFF is, though, a party that involves a T-fal Actifry (see here, it’s cool:, and lots of episodes of Entourage and Project Runway Australia. Probably a pretty lame party for many, too, but it suits me.

    • Hi Angel!

      i was really glad i went, too. i almost blew it off to stay at home and write but forced myself to get out and man, was i glad i did. The sunset here in Yeaman last night was awesome.

      Have fun with Miss Anne Thrope and T-Fal Actifry (which sounds like an Infomercial Rap Star).

      Keep coming back,

      Al K Hall

  2. Major step, perfect season. I remember how hard that was; finding my new party Groove. You took the first step of many towards finding how to Get This Party Started with out Booze. It is SO much better on this side. it only gets better!

    Happy Yeaman Holidays to you!

    Peace, Jen

    • It’s a tough battle, because i can be a little shy and don’t like socializing sober, but i’m also an adult and i don’t have to hang out some place where i’m not comfortable. So i can show up, make an appearance and cut out when i feel like it. But you’re right, it just keeps getting better.

      Keep coming back,

      Al K Hall

  3. Last night a bunch of people in the office must have gone out drinking to celebrate the holidays, judging by how they wasted the morning talking about their hangovers and helping each other to remember what happened. I’m glad they’ve learned not to invite me. One woman, who I was starting to take a liking, to came in at 12:00 and was still drunk. It was heartbreaking watching her carrying on with the illusion that nobody could tell she was wasted. I hate being around drunks. They’re so deluded and pathetic. I wish I could help them but I would have been treated the same way I treated people who tried to help me.

    Like Mrs. D I’m glad you’re finding new friends too. There was a recent blog post on the SMART recovery blog that sums it up:

    “Consider being at a stinky, ugly garbage dump. You get in a car and drive away – keeping your eyes glued to the rear view mirror. “I’m getting away! I’m getting away!” OK, you are getting away. But if you keep your eyes on the rear view mirror, what is likely to happen at the front end of the car? As a wise person once noted, “There’s a reason they make the windshield much larger than the rear view mirror!” Are you looking where you want to go or where you want to leave? If your “eyes are on the prize,” you’ll be looking out the front of the car!”

    Keep looking ahead! .

    • ITSB!

      Thanks for the story. The Rod was talking about something like this over at the Bar None, about how drunk girls really aren’t all that. Sure, it’s a stereotype to think they’re willing to do anything but what you end up with is a sobbing, puking then passed out person who is anything but sexy.

      Very cool bog post and a good message. Indeed, i’m doing my best to keep on keeping on and as long as it feels so much better than the previous life, i’ll keep it up!

      Keep coming back, brother,

      Al K Hall

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