The Me That Was Is Mocking Me Now

The man i used to be made fun of people like me. Optimistic, looking on the bright side, a quick smile…

Maybe i didn’t trust these strangers and figured they were either lying to themselves or to me. Whatever the reason, i considered myself smarter than them because if they knew as much about life as i did, they wouldn’t be half as happy.

Now i see it’s the younger me that was ignorant. So, i don’t mind his laughter.

i just wish he’d clue in a little faster.


About Al K Hall

Like a battered drinker or a punch drunk boxer, i am here for another round. For those of you who don’t know me, i’m a semi-professional writer on the rocks and a non-practicing alcoholic (if after 30 years of practicing, you still can't do something well, it's best to just give it up). For those of you who do know me, thanks for stopping by anyway and where’s the ten bucks you owe me? Welcome to my Bar None. A hole in the wall where we can hang out and trade the kind of stories you swap only when you’ve had one too many and either can’t find your way home or are afraid to. Hell, it’s cheaper than therapy and plus the pictures are prettier. Here we’ll crack open bottles and jokes and ‘last call’ are the only dirty words you’ll never hear. Pull up a stool and make yourselves at home.

Posted on August 22, 2012, in Alcoholism, Lessons in Recovery, Recovery, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 4 Comments.

  1. *Nods* I get that.

  2. I love that picture of that baby, lol. I keep coming back just to see it!

    I also love this post. I read it when it was first posted, and have been back a couple of times since, trying to think of how to best comment — what to say — because it is such a hugely powerful post.

    I know both of those guys you write about. Knowing the young you, I could never imagine after all these years that the older you would write a post like this. It goes to show that you CAN teach an old dog new tricks, and before it is too late and you (meaning the general “one” as in “a person”) go into the N-stages of the condition of alcoholism. Whew.

    The new old you (or is that old new you?) is much wiser. And I am so glad you don’t mind the young you’s laughter. I’m glad you have a new kind of laughter that focuses on the joy of living instead of the cynicism of maintaining unhappiness.


    • Thanks Angel! The photo is such a trip, isn’t it, and so appropriate for this post, which is one of my favorites as well. i just liked the way i felt while writing it, and the way i felt when it was done.

      Keep coming back,

      Al K Hall

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