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Good for you, it’s good for you!

It's The Little Things That Mark You sobriety recovery alcoholism

It’s The Little Things That Mark You

Everyone knows that every Friday my work has an all-you-can-drink cocktail party. When i was drinking, Friday was a regular reminder of what kind of binge drinker i was because no matter how many promises i made to myself, my wife, even my kids, i always got sucked back into the eddy of “just one more”. After that came phone calls and apologies and walking unevenly home and the only thing buoyed me other than the beers i always stole from the office and carried in the deep pockets of my trench coat was the knowing that when i stumbled late into wherever i was supposed to be that there would be some more alcohol there.

Last night i made plans to eat some fast food and see a movie with my 17-year-old son. To meet him at the restaurant, i had to leave work at 5:45 (the cocktail party starts at 5:30, unless you start at the all-you-can-drink wine lunch)—i left 5 minutes early. i did not try to pound as many beers as i could fit into 15 minutes only to end up unable to tear myself away from free booze and calling him with promises i would make it up later. i did not stand him up and i did not let him down.

After our fast food dinner, as we sat waiting for the movie to roll, i realized all i’d done was make and keep an appointment with my son, something most (non alcoholic) people take for granted. It’s such a little thing and yet it is really such a huge thing when i think about it. And i do. A lot. And i’m not the only one.

________________________

Just a little shout out to my sober buddy Drunky Drunk Girl, whose blog post inspired this one.

PS i hate the title of this post but like it too much to change it. Just so’s ya know.

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About Al K Hall

Like a battered drinker or a punch drunk boxer, i am here for another round. For those of you who don’t know me, i’m a semi-professional writer on the rocks and a non-practicing alcoholic (if after 30 years of practicing, you still can't do something well, it's best to just give it up). For those of you who do know me, thanks for stopping by anyway and where’s the ten bucks you owe me? Welcome to my Bar None. A hole in the wall where we can hang out and trade the kind of stories you swap only when you’ve had one too many and either can’t find your way home or are afraid to. Hell, it’s cheaper than therapy and plus the pictures are prettier. Here we’ll crack open bottles and jokes and ‘last call’ are the only dirty words you’ll never hear. Pull up a stool and make yourselves at home. http://about.me/AlKHall

Posted on November 25, 2012, in Alcoholism, Lessons in Recovery, Recovery and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 10 Comments.

  1. The little things in life that sobriety allows us to cherish on a grand scale. Awesome.

  2. Yeah – awesome! What a great dad, lucky son. Isn’t it great how when we just keep on living sober we just settle into a nice existence without the booze, and once we’re over those tough early stages it’s fine isn’t it. Just fine. For many years my work had Friday night drinks which guaranteed a hangover ever Saturday morning… so many years getting hammered at work drinks on a Friday…rolling into town..rolling home. Great post – don’t mind the title at all! xxxx

    • Hi Mrs D!

      “Great” dad, is a large stretch… Let’s say i’m a better dad and headed in the right direction. Just like life in recovery! Glad to hear you’re feeling it, too.

      Keep coming back,

      Al K Hall

  3. Omigosh — that pic is the cutest ever. 🙂 What a cute idea, lol.

    Wow — what an image of the drinking days: the Heinekens in the deep pockets. I so remember you coming home, clanking around with sometimes just two, but I think often there were three or four, stashed in those pockets! Blast from the past…

    Watching you get sucked down that eddy was so hard because we were all helpless and powerless against it. It was like watching you drowning, wondering if this was the time the water would claim you or not.

    The story of the other night with the Boy is so touching, though. What a great contrast. There’s a lot that is getting healed there, buddy, for you and for him. And yeah, you are right: it is huge. Giant. And really, really good.

    Keep it up. It’s working. You are doing beautifully, and I am so glad you get to have these times with your son while there is time with him (cue Harry Chapin Carpenter here, eh?).

    I’m happy for you.
    xx
    Celeste

    • Thank you for the kind words and encouragement, babe! Things are definitely looking up in that respect.

      Isn’t the picture cool? Times are evolving, like me!

      See you in the streets,

      Al K Hall

      PS Harry Chapin 😉

  4. Miss Anne Thrope

    I think that with all the pain your addiction has brought you, it’s only fair that it should eventually bring you some joy, like the mindfulness and feeling of joy in such a simple thing as making and keeping an appointment. So many people can’t feel that, or obsess about some detail that went wrong, or are so focused on what’s next that they’re just not present. And that ability to sit there and be present, and even pat yourself on the back and just plain old feel good about something like that is, well, priceless.

    • Hi Miss Anne,

      i didn’t think about that… Not only did i avoid a regret, i also was able to enjoy the moment. It’s like i was drunk without the alcohol (and the hangover!). Thanks for adding another dimension to the evening!

      Keep coming back,

      Al K Hall

  5. Hi. Tats, 25 cents….a Friday evening with your son, priceless. Another awesome treasure to add to the memory box. Love this. L.

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