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Have no fear

Used 2013-09-29 I'm afraid to tell you (AlKHall sobriety recovery)

i’d been an alcoholic for over 2 decades before i first heard the expression “Liquid Courage”, but after i did i couldn’t believe i’d never heard it before. Let’s just say i didn’t need subtitles to understand what it meant.

Lately things have been improving concerning that and here’s why.

  1. i learned early on that i had to give up my life to my Higher Power because when i was driving the bus, i drove it straight to Hell and got lost there. Giving the wheel to my Higher Power means i have nothing to fear because the HP is in charge. (For agnostics, just remember “The future is none of your business“. )
  2. On my sponsor’s instructions, i share at every AA meeting i go to (3 a week, usually). The more i share in front of a group of people, the less tense i am about it.
  3. i’m able to recognize the symptoms of fear and when i do i’m getting better at consciously telling myself to chill. Breathing deep is a big help when it comes to this.
Used 2013-09-29 Bullet Proof Vest Tester (AlKHall sobriety recovery)

Bullet Proof Vest Testers have balls bigger than all outdoors

The reason i’m going on about this is that i’ve only just learned these lessons and only have made significant progress with them in the last couple of weeks.

Unfortunately, because i think the girl i have a crush on has been avoiding my regular meetings because she had a crush on me too, but when i didn’t make a move she assumed i didn’t feel the same way so she’s given up. Which is sad but not tragic. i keep reminding myself that i can’t lose something i never had, and that sometimes rejection is God’s protection.

Still, i do wish i’d been braver sooner, and hope that the universe has some second chances left in its deep pockets.

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About Al K Hall

Like a battered drinker or a punch drunk boxer, i am here for another round. For those of you who don’t know me, i’m a semi-professional writer on the rocks and a non-practicing alcoholic (if after 30 years of practicing, you still can't do something well, it's best to just give it up). For those of you who do know me, thanks for stopping by anyway and where’s the ten bucks you owe me? Welcome to my Bar None. A hole in the wall where we can hang out and trade the kind of stories you swap only when you’ve had one too many and either can’t find your way home or are afraid to. Hell, it’s cheaper than therapy and plus the pictures are prettier. Here we’ll crack open bottles and jokes and ‘last call’ are the only dirty words you’ll never hear. Pull up a stool and make yourselves at home. http://about.me/AlKHall

Posted on September 29, 2013, in Alcoholics Anonymous, Alcoholism, Lessons in Recovery, Recovery and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. Those aren’t second chances left in the deep pockets, Al. Those are opportunities to improve. Great stuff, as usual,my friend!

  2. Al, I learn something profound from you every time I read (seriously, I think of “sobriety is like pizza” every time I eat pizza… which is A LOT!). Today, “rejection is God’s protection” is a take-away, and I am going to marvel at the fact that you share at every meeting you attend. That is very, very awesome, and I’m going to consider that route for myself!

    As for the girl, I don’t know about Yeaman, but where I am AA is a very, very small world. There is not a doubt in my mind you will get that second chance, and I can’t wait to read about it!

    Thanks for the inspiration, as always!

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